Gratitude

I have had many incedence now where i am left without a housekeeper. I live in a big house which has three flights of stairs plus an outside patio in the front and the back. Living in this house without help is too challenging. I have noticed a pattern, every time I am left without a housekpeeper for a few months, my health begins to decline. My body aches more on a daily basis, I get soar throats and coughs and most of the time I end up having to take an antibiotic. Right now, I am again left without a housekeeper because of another strange incident and now I have a soar throat and extreme body ache. Of course all this effects my mood, feeling low and extremely tired and have a short tolerance.

I am so grateful that I am even able to get help. I think about all those people with MS who have kids and homes and may not be able to afford extra help and I feel gratitude. Thank you God. For now, it's part time help every now and then and with the will of God I will manage my situation without getting too sick. I am hopeful and I pray I will settle with a good housekeeper at the end.

I would like to live in a simpler house. Preferable no stairs and lots of storage space. But for now, I pray to be strong in this challenging time and try to overcome the physical weakness.

Extreme Fatigue

I have been feeling extremely tired for the past few months. I haven't had a housekeeper since beginning of September so more then two months and a half. This happened to me before about two years ago. My old housekeeper left and It took a long time for the replacement to come. I remember how hard it was for me then as well. I wake up everyday with pain in the soles of my feet and heels. I drag myself out of bed get the lunch boxes ready send off the kids to school and tidy the house as much as I can. I miss having more energy to do more things.

I think about energy a lot lately. I want to do so much to increase it. I am trying to eat well, but it's hard to enjoy eating when you are always doing things in the house for the kids and homework and baths and reading. Kids are also hard to handle when you are tired. I pray I will be a better mother. Have more patience. But it's so hard when you are facing physical challenges and no one really understands what you are going through. My comfort is that God does. He knows exactly how I am feeling, therefore I leave it to you God.

I have so many things I want to accomplish but so little energy. I will probably be getting a new housekeeper at the beginning of 2012. I pray she will be good and that 2012 will be my best year yet! As I sit here on the computer I feel every joint and muscle in my body ache. I know this feeling will not last and that maybe in the next hour or so I will feel better. It's like that for me. I go through different energy levels throughout the day. One hour I feel useless with absolutely no energy and the next I feel a bit better. I know this is all because I don't get enough sleep and rest. I don’t need more than 8 hours of sleep a night, but what I do need is non interrupted sleep. My daughter God bless her usually wakes me up once in the night.

Last night I worked until 10:30 on my business even though i really shouldn’t' have. I keep telling myself I wont work on anything after 8 to give my mind peace and rest before I sleep, but there is so much work to be done and I really want our business to be a success. I want to have a steady income from my own business. In today’s turbulent market I feel this is what will secure my future. With the will of God, all my fatigue and daily physically challenges will all pay off.

Still Incredibly Happy to be off Drugs

It's been a while since I last updated my blog. Life is good thanks to God. I'm currently on vacation. I had a very challenging time before I came home to visit my parents. My daughter had to do an operation to remove her tonsils. My housekeeper left and I had to look for a replacement. I feel so much pressure when i have a lot of events hit at once. Now I feel fantastic. I'm eating well, sleeping well, life is good. I always feel so wonderful when I enter my parents house. It's comfort, joy, peace of mind. My kids are also having a great time. I enrolled them in a summer camp which is keeping them busy.

I'm going to update my website pages today and add Dr. Mercola's website. I've been reading his updates for the past few months and I just love the information he brings. Really by far the best Natural Health Newsletter I've ever received.

I am waiting to hear fromt the client for a poject for my business. I'm still very hopeful. I believe it will be a huge success with the will of God.

Not Sleeping Well

Well my mood has been normal, and not much to complain about except I have not been sleeping well for the past few days maybe two weeks. Just don't sleep deeply and wake up during the night. It get's me a bit worried about my health. Due to the lack of sleep, i only went to the gym once this week, which i'm not to happy about. With the will of God my body will snap back and I will be able to get deep sleep soon.

Vacation Update

So I came back from a vacation which I enjoyed tremendously. My body coped well with the strain of lots of walking and long air flights plus taking care of the kids. I still took my vitamins and ate as healthy as I could.

I experienced so many new things which let me get out of my box for a while, which was really amazing. We live so long in our routines that we forget the wonders of this amazing world.

I also did things that I normally would be scared to do. I have a fear of hights, yet I went on a very high cable car which had different stops up the mountains. I was quite nervous and holding tightly on to the kids, but I managed and was very happy I experienced it. I realized how much fear I have and how little fear most everyone around me had. I also realized I have more fear after I had children. I am afraid for them which heighten my fear.

There was this one man who was on stretchers who I admired tremendously. He went all the way up then walked on steep stairs that went around the mountain to a suspended bridge and it was a challenge for me without stretchers. I love it when I see people who are determined to experience things no matter what challenge they are facing. I pray I will be less afraid.

Feeling Great

Thanks to God, I am feeling great. I wake up early, I sleep deeply and I have good energy. I am accomplishing more then usual and I'm just feeling mentally and physically alive. I also have been going to exercise classes a lot more which definitely makes me feel stronger. Exercise is probably what is making me feel stronger. I would like to stick to at least 3 times a week going to my classes and I am happy. I am doing body balance, yoga, body pump and pilates. Body pump is great because i use weights, body balance, yoga and pilots i am using my own body for strength. I pray my business will also take off. Still have a lot of work to get it going, but I am hopeful.

Good News

So I went to the doctor yesterday to follow up on the blood tests and MRI that i did. It has been six months since I stopped taking the medication and I was a bit nervous. Are there going to be new lesions? Will I have to go back on the medication? I had felt a bit of tingling in my head and I also had headaches recently but i was also very tired because of other life situations i was going through. So, these were the thoughts i had. I have been so happy not having to take the injections and I didn't feel depressed at times like I did when I was on the medication.

Thankfully when the doctor opened up my reports he told me that all was great! No new lesions and the old ones have had no significant change. My blood tests were also all good. I am very relieved and happy and I want to remain commited to my health. With the will of God, I will remain strong and sturdy without the medication. I still want to commit more to doing more excersize and of course stick to taking my vitamins.

Update

I haven't been sleeping very deeply lately and I am feeling more tired then usual. I want to go to the doctor today and do complete blood work. I won't be doing my next MRI until November. By then it would have been six months since I took my last injection. I hope things would have either remained the same or improved.

Feeling Fantasic

I'm on vacation now visiting my family and I've started taking Pilates classes. I go three times a week and use pilates machines, first the reformer and now the cadilac. Pilates is proving to be the best work out i've done yet. It tones, trims and elongates the body, work on inner body balance, it is a holistic type of workout. I am feeling strong and healthy. With the will of God, I will keep to exercising at least three times a week.

Excited About LIfe

So I went to see the doctor I talked about and it was a great visit. He was very supportive of my need to stop taking the drugs and he said he doesn't recommend staying on these drugs for longer then a year and half anyway because our bodes build resistance to them. He reviewed my last two MRI's saying that things remained the same and stable and I should come back to him in six months to do my next MRI to see how I am doing off the drugs. The last MRI I did was a year ago.

I haven't seen this doctor for 2 and a half years. He was my original doctor, but after I had my last big relapse two and half years ago, I had gone to another doctor for another opinion and he suggested I start a medication. Something I didn't necessarily want to do but I was too weak hearted and scared so I gave in and started the drug therapy. Despite the fact that I don't think medication is the answer for MS, I am happy I experienced MS taking the meds. It has made me more commited to my health. I eat better then ever, I am commited to taking my vitamins and I have started excersizing again.

The hardship of having to commit to first giving myself injections 3 times a week on Rebif was the most challenging time of the disease. The side effects took away any energy that I had and took away from the quality of my life. When I finally said I enough, the doctor asked me to try Avonex which would have fewer side effects and only be injected once a week. So I went on Avonex for the next 18 months. The side effects were much less and more tolerable. I only felt body weakeness the day of the injection and it did not last long. However, I do feel these drugs increased my anxiety and temperament.

Now that I am drug free I'm so excited about life! Now I know if I lose my temper with my kids it is because of my own weakness and not from any negative influence form a drug! I am committed more then ever to myself. The holistic aproach will be my medication. I will cleanse my thoughts by listening to James Allen on a daily basis, my spirit by praying, my body by eating great foods and excersizing. With the will of God, I will purify my character more each day and enjoy life knowing that I am relying on myself not a drug for my health.

Making Decisions

I have finally made the decision to stop medication. May 20th was my last injection. Two days before my 31st birthday. I have been feeling tingling in my arms and legs on and off for the past week or so but I have had that while on the medication so I am not worried. I feel strong and positive and ready to take on the world. I take my vitamins on a regular basis, I eat well and I'm going to join the gym soon.

What incouraged me to finally make this decision was when I called up the neurologist I used to visit before my current doctor. I explained to him I have been on the drugs for more then 2 and half years and I was ready to take a break. I was never dependent on drugs for five years before i started them and I don't want to be on them now. He was the first doctor who said what I wanted to hear. He said it would be fine to stop. It just took a doctor to tell me that and I finally felt I could do it! NO FEAR! That is the most important part. I could get off the drug with complete confidence. With the will of God, I am going to be better then ever before. My body will do its own healing with my support to my immune system. I believe in the miracle of my body and I know it is capable of unraveling my MS.

Results of My CT Scan (Angiography)

Well I went by the lab and got my results for my ct scan. I was very disappointed to find that everything was normal. I was expecting to find a blockage in the veins in my neck, but according to the results all is normal. I was incredibly let down by the results. It's strange how I felt so let down. I so desperately wanted to find a narrowing of the veins. I sill don't understand how this could be if Zamboni said that all MS patients have this blockage. I will make an appointment soon to see the vascular surgeon about the results. I just wonder why the doctor himself said he saw there was a blockage on the right side of my neck and then the results show that things are normal. There are a lot of unanswered question's. With the will of God, I will get the right answers.

My Quest to Test Zamboni's Findings

Well I haven't written in a bit over a month and a lot has happened since then. First, my daughter's birthday, my housekeeper left back to her home country and I am awaiting my new housekeeper who is arriving later then I expected. It's been tough on me without the extra help. I feel my sleep has been very disturbed and I have felt very low on energy, but i still feel 2010 is going to be an incredible year! I feel it will be a year of change. So despite my lack of good sleep and energy levels, I am hopeful. When the new housekeeper comes i will settle back into my life and start working on my business again. Right now my life is all about my kids.

At the beginning of the month I went to see my Neurologist about Zamboni's findings. As I had expected, he dismissed it. I sat there while he read the entire article and then he gave me unclear reasons why it didn't make sense. I told him I would see a Vascular surgeon about it and he recommended one to me.

So on December 30, I went to see a Vascular surgeon about Zamboni's findings. I was very excited to see what the doctor had to say. After I explained to him I have MS and showed him the article explaining Zamboni's findings, He found it interesting and checked my neck veins in a machine in his office. He was pretty surprised when he did in fact find that the vein on the right side of my neck was indeed narrowing. He decided to let me take an angio ct scan neck and brain. I did that about a week ago. It was a strange procedure. I had an injection which made my body feel a bit heated at one point and for some reason I was very nervous doing this test. Then i laid down and my brain and neck were put under a machine which did the proper testing. The whole procedure took about 30 minutes and it costed double the cost of the usual MRI. Thank God for insurance! The results should be out in a weeks time. I hope, with the will of God, I am on the path to great health.

Excited About Dr. Zamboni's Findings!

I was send an attachment about a former Vascular Surgeon in Italy who has found an incredible finding that could halt MS progression and could also help with many of the symptoms. http://www.ctv.ca/servlet/ArticleNews/story/CTVNews/20091120/W5_liberation_091121/20091121?s_name=W5

Check this link out to hear the entire story, but basically he believes that MS is actually originally a Vascular disease. He found that in all the MS patients he tested, they all had narrowing, twisting or outright blockage of the veins that are supposed to flush blood from the brain. He checked these veins in healthy people, and found none of these malformations. He also did not find these blockages in those with other neurological conditions.

"Not only was the blood not flowing out of the brain, it was "refluxing" reversing and flowing back upwards. Zamboni believes that as the blood moves into the brain, pressure builds in the veins, forcing blood into the brain's grey matter where it sets off a host of reactions, possibly explaining the symptoms MS."

I have read a lot about Zamboni on the Internet and feel this is it. The most exciting part is that there is actually an easy procedure to open up the veins and let the blood flow freely. I am going to see my neurologist soon so I can get him to give me an MRV (Magnetic Resonance Venography) and a Doppler ultrasound for the neck. I want to see that I have this narrowing that the doctor is talking about. I still believe in diet and lifestyle, but if there is a narrowing, and it can be fixed, that can only make the blood circulation in the body better and in turn making us feel better! With the will of God, this doctor is onto the biggest discovery for curing MS.

New Outlook on Life

To be honest, I am not doing too well the past few weeks. Feel tired and my legs go heavy at times and my energy levels were not very stable. My mood would get really low at times and as usual I would think of quitting my medication. I would also mention to those loved ones around me that I was tired and not doing well.

I have decided to shift my way of thinking. Number one, I will not think of stopping the medication anymore unless I find my MRI's are getting worse. Because that idea should i or shouldn't I quit has really taken its tole on me. I am too weak to make that decision to quit so I might as well stay on it willingly. I have been on Avonex for more then ten months and I'm going to stick to it. Second of all, I won't complain or mention to people or to myself that I am extremely tired at times, I will take advantage of those moments and just rest and read and learn more from my great books. I must take every event that comes into my life with ease and complete submission, and that is what I am aiming to do. Third of all, I won't let MS get in my way of my dreams in achieving my business. I have been letting MS stop me from working harder and achieving more and I won't let that happen with the will of God. I am reading a book right now called Think and Grow Rich and i feel it's going to make a profound impact on my life.

Business Update

It's been a while since I wrote on my blog. I've come back from my vacation and have been enjoying the summer months and it's almost time for my children to start school again.
My health is good. I have my days when I am more agitated then others, but I am very happy because I have fasted this month of Ramadan. I did not fast the days I take my shots since I feel I need panadol to help with the joint pain. I am very happy that i was at least able to fast most of the month compared to last year. When I was on Rebif it was impossible.
On another note, today I got great feedback about the products that I make for my business. It was very positive and very promising. I know I have a treasure in my hands and with the will of God, I will make a difference in people's lives.

Update Since MRI

I haven't updated my blog for a while. My MRI went well. The doctor told me that I have no new lesions and that they have all gotten a bit smaller. To me that is great news! If you look back on my blog, almost exactly a year ago some time in July, I said that I would be MS free a year from the time I wrote that message. I am not MS free, but I am on my way to recovery. He of course thinks that the vitamins have nothing to do with it, God only knows, but I am still taking them along with the weekly shots.

My son's operation also went well. We are all in good health and I am now taking a little vacation visiting my family. My business is all set up and ready to go. When I get back to my home I plan on starting to get it going. With the will of God, it will be a success.

Scheduled to do MRI

Since the last time, I didn't take my shot on time. My body reacted poorly. I felt as if my body got used to the shot. I went back the next day and took my shot. I'm dong well. I just get extreme tension at times especially the day of the injection.
My business is coming along. I'm very hopeful and nervous as well. I pray that I will be able to carry on the business and it will only strengthen me, inside and out.
I am scheduled to do an MRI on Saturday. With the will of God, it will show me that I am on my way to recovery. The next day my son is to do surgery. I'm not worried about it. He has to do a tonsillectomy, adenoidectomy and a right meringotomy. They are all simple procedures and I think it will clear up any of the problems he has with the ear, nose, and throat with the will of God.

Extreme Tension

I feel extreme tension build up. I feel it in my head. Everything bothers me and gets to me. I feel extremely fragile today. I can't take it anymore. I feel maybe I really need to do something about it. I overreact to everything more then ever. I need to just relax. I think I will stop taking the shots for a little bit and see how I feel. With the will of God, I will make the right decision and stick to it.

Update on My Health

The test results were all fine. However, I do think I have Candida. Even though the tests don't show it, I know it is not detectable in tests many times. The fact that i had it in my stool test after my operation also indicates that it is present even if now it is not detectable. I am eating well. I take vitamins regularly, and I try to eat as gluten free as possible. I feel alright these days. I'm accomplishing what I set out to do every day and my mood is alright. My business is coming along and I'm very hopeful about its future.